Henry, Dorothy, Benedict, and Anthony

Henry Who?

Henri J.M Nouwen was born in 1932, and ordained a Roman Catholic priest in 1957. A teacher and a psychologist from 1964 to 1982 at Notre Dame, Harvard, and Yale. He spent time as a missionary to Bolivia, Peru, Mexico, Nicaragua, and Honduras. In his last years of life, he was a pastor at L'Arche Daybreak, a community for handicapped adults in Canada. He wrote over 30 books.
He started working with intellectuals and progressed to a life with disabled adults. He evolved from a college professor of psychology to a man living with the disabled and loving it. What is the value of the disabled? According to Henry he got and received Mercy. With the disabled. "What makes us human is not our mind, but our heart, not our ability to think but our ability to love."

The inspiration to me: The importance of Mercy. My daughter Michelle is developmentally disabled. That quote on ‘what makes us human’ has a specific and real meaning for me. Michelle has a great ability to love. I depend on the mercy of others everyday Michelle goes out into the world.

Dorothy Day (November 8, 1897 - November 29, 1980), initially Marxist, became Catholic in 1927. She was the cofounder in 1933 of the Catholic Worker Movement, which espouses nonviolent action, and hospitality for the homeless, hungry and forsaken.
The movement started with the Catholic Worker newspaper she and a fellow social activist founded. This paper took a neutral, pacifist position in the war-torn 1930s. She opened a "house of hospitality" in the slums of New York City. The movement quickly spread to other cities in the US, and to Canada England and seven other countries. Well over 100 communities exist today.

“We don't happen to believe that Washington, D.C., is the moral capital of America.... If you want to know the kind of politics we seek, you can go to your history books and read about the early years of this country. We would like to see more small communities organizing themselves, people talking with people, people caring for people ... we believe we are doing what our Founding Fathers came here to do, to worship God in the communities they settled. They were farmers. They were crafts-people. They took care of each other. They prayed to God, and they thanked Him for showing them the way--to America!

The inspiration to me: The effect of Action – with a capital A – on the world around us. Dorothy Day did what she could and made a difference. It encouraged me to do the same. You’ve seen me in the cafeteria raising funds for Ability First. My wife and I actually helped Ability First get a building, find a staff, find families that needed a place that would provide After School care for their developmentally disabled child. Until they opened their doors five years ago. Action – and not just any action but a right action. That’s what I’m talking about.

Benedict 480 – 547 The founder of the Order of Saint Benedict. Do you know of the black robed monks called Benedictines? Do you know of the abbey in Italy named Monte Cassino? That is the site where he built the abbey on the ruins of a temple of Apollo. He wrote the Rule of Benedict – the rule book referred to and used in some way by most Chrisitian monasteries.

Benedict promotes a balanced pattern of living and praying. According to a Gregory, one of his biographers, Benedict told him about a vision received toward the end of his life: In the dead of night he suddenly beheld a flood of light shining down from above more brilliant than the sun, and with it every trace of darkness cleared away. The whole world was gathered up before his eyes "in what appeared to be a single ray of light".

I’m an Oblate. Oblates are men and women living in the world according to the spirit of Saint Benedict and are always affiliated with a particular monastery. I am affiliated with Prince of Peace Abbey in Oceanside.

The effect on me: It’s a hard practice. The black robed monks of Prince of Peace gather together to read psalms, sermons, and prayers five times a day. I consistently find other things to do with my time. Occasionally I remember to trust God and pray. That abbey and those monks remind me that the focus and pace of life can be measured. That one can have the time to sit quietly and feel the grace of God. That one can listen and sing along with a group of monks and know that same psalm has been sung in this manner for many centuries. Timeless. At peace. Loved.

I’m not claiming sainthood – as any one who knows me could prove otherwise. I’m sharing an inspiration

Anthony Caciagli. My wifes father. My father in law. When Denise and I were trying to buy our first house he let us move in (with a baby) for a month to save money. He modeled this thing he called ‘dining’. To dine is to go to a fine restaurant with family or friends and enjoy several wines, several courses, and good conversation. I was raised on fried chicken, mashed potatoes, and peas & carrots. Before Anthony wine was something the vacuum cleaner did. A few Anthonyisms:

‘Never go to bed Angry’

A couple should sleep in the same bed

Is it free? Take two!

If you can’t pay for it cash, don’t buy it.

Didjaeat?

Gimme a Hug.

Charity Begins at Home

The effect on me: My father in law models a joy and wisdom on married life. I come from a family that exploded. Parents divorced, fought, moved around the country. Brothers scattered to the four corners of the U.S. Anthony showed me another way. ‘Gimee a Hug and how about a glass of wine’?

Mercy: Henry Nouwen
You get it when you give it. It is a disposition to be kind and forgiving. It is the alleviation of distress. It beats Judgement every time. Which would you rather have: Judgement or Mercy?

Action: Dorothy Day
There can be no action without prayer and no prayer without action.
We are called to liberation and may only achieve it by conferring to others the freedom we seek for ourselves.

Balance: Benedict
Work and Prayer. Action and Silence. Routine and Change. All in balance.

Commitment: Anthony

‘Never go to bed Angry’ and my favorite 'A couple should sleep in the same bed

Anthony is married over 50 years. Commitment.